Business Communication

(Please see the previous post for the first part of this story)

Jerry wrote back saying essentially that his motive for trying to help his boss was because of Jerry’s own responsibility to the organization. He talked about nobody else daring to tell the boss about the problem. Jerry also talked about putting himself in jeopardy if he brought the matter up.

Here’s my next e-mail.

“Dear Jerry,

Your problem is common and usually ignored; sharing it will be helpful to others.

That is an excellent reason for at least attempting to have the conversation.

Asking him if he is aware of the problem and if he is, offering him your suggested solutions, might work. Caution: do NOT proceed without his express permission.

Assume that his intentions were honorable. They probably were. I would also assume that he has a blind spot about what is happening. You are not helping anyone by keeping silent.

My suggestions have helped others achieve positive outcomes. As long as you ask respectful questions instead of scolding you can protect yourself.

You have a real sense of honor and an obligation to the good of the organization. Think through how you will approach him in a way that allows him to maintain his dignity.

Please check out the blog posts for suggestions.

If you think it would help, I am available for telephone consultation @ $75 for thirty minutes payable by credit card. Laurie

I wish I could share Jerry’s additional comments.

I am happy to answer your questions, especially if you are willing to allow me to share the conversation with others.
Learn more about communicating with integrity in The Integrity Course, an online, multimedia home-study course to help you say what you think without getting fired or losing your friends.

Technorati Tags: Conflict, Difficult Communication, Business Communication, Integrity, Managing Conflict, Telling the Truth

I recently had an extended e-mail conversation with a subscriber. I intended to post it because his problem is so common. However, Jerry (not really his name) denied permission to post his side of the conversation. So I’m going to post only my letters and summarize his, in the most general terms.

Essentially, Jerry questioned, his boss’s judgment. From Jerry’s perspective his boss made a Continue Reading »

Say what you think

Say what you feel.

Say what you mean.

Say it quickly — take your time.

Say it right or something awful will surely happen.

Say it wrong and Continue Reading »

Evelyn complained that one of her bosses was wasting her time. As a young attorney in a medium-sized firm, she considered every partner in the firm to be “her boss.”

One of the partners, Roger, was the real problem. She didn’t mind when Continue Reading »

February is National Self-Esteem Month.

Dr. Joe Rubino, an internationally acclaimed expert on the topic of self-esteem has written an article entitled “The Impact of Lacking Self-Esteem on Business Professionals.”

Check it out along with his offer of $129 in complimentary gifts just for taking a look. http://www.cprsuccess.com/selfesteembusiness.

You’ll also receive more than $10,000 in free bonus gifts with any purchase at http://www.SelfEsteemSystem.com.

Free Mini-Course: Integrity — Use It or Lose It!
Free Mini-Course: Secrets for Turning Difficult Conversations into Amazing Opportunities for Cooperation and Success

Technorati Tags: Business Communication, Emotional Intelligence, Management Development, Self-Management, Self Esteem

Pressure, stress, and the need to make effective choices about how to use time are some of the critical issues shared by most of my coaching clients, and by most business and professional people. Becoming superwomen or supermen isn‘t really the answer for surviving in a speeded-up world. 

Are you challenging yourself to discover more effective and comfortable ways to use your non-renewable time resources? 

In trying to maintain a balance between your business and personal lives, you probably find it hard to avoid the distractions that rob you of your irreplaceable time. 

These ideas may help you think a little differently about the situation. Continue Reading »

Assume that differences are opportunities for exploration. When you take the position that you are right and others are wrong, nobody wins.

Richness is created from diversity. Sometimes survival depends on it. A series of exercises were once devised to simulate being lost on the moon, lost in the Arctic, lost at sea (in a lifeboat) or in some other life-threatening situation. 

Teams were given a list of resources and told to choose those that would be most important for their survival. They needed to reach consensus about which few items they could keep. Their choices were compared with choices made by true experts in each situation.

Research showed the teams did much better when everyone contributed their knowledge. When they deferred to “experts” on the team, important information from less knowledgeable players was omitted and team scores declined. The livelier the discussions (arguments???), the better the team scores seem to be.

Some things you can do to make this work on your team are:

• Describe the differences of opinion or perspective that you notice 
• Respectfully ask questions to clarify those differences
• Listen to the answers without unnecessary interruption
• Interrupt only to ask clarifying questions
• Do your best to understand the reasoning that leads to the differences
• If you disagree, challenge the idea and not the person
• Allow enough time to complete these important conversations.

Remember, when every one thinks alike important information is usually omitted. When everyone has the same skills tasks are completed in a lopsided way. When everything looks the same the view is boring. Go for the richness.

Free Mini-Course: Integrity — Use It or Lose It!
Free Mini-Course: Secrets for Turning Difficult Conversations into Amazing Opportunities for Cooperation and Success

Technorati Tags: Making Decisions, Difficult Communication, Emotional Intelligence, Human Resources, Business Communication, Coaching

Expect the amount of time and attention you share with each of your co-workers to vary from day to day, week to week and assignment to assignment. 

This may seem self-evident, but if you become accustomed to lots of attention and don’t get it, remember, it does not necessarily mean anything about you. And if you suddenly get more attention than you’re used to, Continue Reading »

Vary your responses to workplace disagreements. Don’t expect to always give in to an associate or to always have it your own way. Getting stuck in any position drains the energy from a working relationship.

If you received a report card, would it say you work and play well with others? Or would it say that you are accommodating? Or a bully? You don’t actually get that kind of a report card it the workplace, but if you want great working relationships you do need to pay attention to it.

The best response to a disagreement is usually to take the time to understand each other’s positions.

• Ask questions to clarify exactly what you disagree about.
• Restate your coworker’s position in your own words. This will help you be sure you have really understood his or her position.
• Ask your coworker to restate your position.
• Listen for the reasons your coworker has taken this position.
• State your own reasons for your position.
• Clarify as much as necessary to be sure you understand each other.

Once you have completed these steps, the resolution may be obvious. Many disagreements happen because people are more interested in being right or looking good than solving problems.

These steps take the pressure off the situation and allow you to take your respective egos out of the picture. If you have not reached an agreement try brainstorming possible solutions that address as many of both your important points as possible.

Keep listening and clarifying until your solution emerges.

Free Mini-Course: Integrity — Use It or Lose It!
Free Mini-Course: Secrets for Turning Difficult Conversations into Amazing Opportunities for Cooperation and Success

Technorati Tags: Managing Conflict, Conflict, Difficult Communication, Business Communication

Assume that differences are opportunities for exploration. When you take the position that you are right and others are wrong, nobody wins.

Richness is created from diversity. Sometimes survival depends on it. A series of exercises were once devised to simulate being lost on the moon, lost in the Arctic, lost at sea (in a lifeboat) or in some other life-threatening situation.

Teams were given a list of resources and told to choose those that would be most important for their survival. They needed to reach consensus about which few items they could keep. Continue Reading »